Selfish Runner
As you know, last year at the young age of 45, I decided to be a runner. The motivation was to jump start some weight loss. I have dropped 20 lbs and my body has been in a transformation - my backside has really seen a reduction, even when I was naturally a size 3 - I had an ample backside. I am still not very fast and on my long work out I walk 3.5 miles and jog 3.5 miles. I really do enjoy walking and I read other running blogs and my miles and speed are of no comparison. As an empty nester this is prob the first real thing that is all about me and I really don't feel guilty about. Should I?
I read on Running On Happy how she went from a solo runner to really enjoying team running. I am not sure I am ready for that - the team runners on the Greenway like to run all beside each other which takes up nearly the entire lane and they are usually talking. The last thing I want to do right now is talk while I run, I guess running is my selfish time and I do not want to share with anyone. I do wonder though after reading her blog if perhaps a running partner might force me to challenge myself more.
I still like to walk on my long runs - I really do enjoy walking - I can hear the birds and enjoy the nature and I do a lot of thinking and talking to God. I must admit though that when a runner passes me on my walk - I feel a twinge of embarrassment - almost like I think the runners are the cool kids :)
I also have to say when I am jogging I am too focused on my task at hand and getting to that last mile marker. The feeling after I reach those goals and that I actually jogged, well that is whole point! Could a running partner help me run farther or faster? Would that be worth the sacrifice of my "me time" How would I find someone close to my running level - I think it would be embarrassing to me is to run with someone - I am not sure my form is good and would I be able to keep up and I would't want to run with someone that I had to slow down and mess up my calorie burn - I really do sound too selfish to run with others. Then I found a post by Crazy Running that posed the question and I agree with her summation :)
I have been asked by two runners so far to run with them but for now - I'll work on myself and enjoy my "me time" Really, you can have and should have YOUR time and not feel guilty.
I read on Running On Happy how she went from a solo runner to really enjoying team running. I am not sure I am ready for that - the team runners on the Greenway like to run all beside each other which takes up nearly the entire lane and they are usually talking. The last thing I want to do right now is talk while I run, I guess running is my selfish time and I do not want to share with anyone. I do wonder though after reading her blog if perhaps a running partner might force me to challenge myself more.
I still like to walk on my long runs - I really do enjoy walking - I can hear the birds and enjoy the nature and I do a lot of thinking and talking to God. I must admit though that when a runner passes me on my walk - I feel a twinge of embarrassment - almost like I think the runners are the cool kids :)
I also have to say when I am jogging I am too focused on my task at hand and getting to that last mile marker. The feeling after I reach those goals and that I actually jogged, well that is whole point! Could a running partner help me run farther or faster? Would that be worth the sacrifice of my "me time" How would I find someone close to my running level - I think it would be embarrassing to me is to run with someone - I am not sure my form is good and would I be able to keep up and I would't want to run with someone that I had to slow down and mess up my calorie burn - I really do sound too selfish to run with others. Then I found a post by Crazy Running that posed the question and I agree with her summation :)
I have been asked by two runners so far to run with them but for now - I'll work on myself and enjoy my "me time" Really, you can have and should have YOUR time and not feel guilty.
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